


You Make My Heart Beat Faster

by TheOrgasmicSeke



Series: The Destruction and Resurrection of Armin Arlert [5]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Zombie Apocalypse, I mean, Jearmin Week, M/M, Some Fluff, day 1- protection, it may hurt a bit?, it's jeans ultimate goal here to always protect armin, sorta - Freeform, there's like nothing else I can think to tag this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-13
Updated: 2014-07-13
Packaged: 2018-02-08 18:14:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1951173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheOrgasmicSeke/pseuds/TheOrgasmicSeke
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As if the world ending wasn't enough for them to handle, Jean and Armin become separated. Bits and pieces of the events from TDRAA in Jean's point of view.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Make My Heart Beat Faster

**Author's Note:**

> So, alas, here we are again. I'm re-opening this AU. Why? Well, it's Jearmin week for one and I wanted to contribute SOMETHING. Secondly, because this world is going to continue on. As you will see at the end of this. Basically, this is Jean's POV from the moment he met Armin. Just bits and pieces, because we'll look more into what Jean did without Armin once I rehash the series. 
> 
> Warnings: Nothing too bad. A bit of blood.
> 
> You don't HAVE to read the previous parts to read this but it would make a whole lot more sense if you did.

I was lucky. Damn lucky. No man on the face of the planet was more lucky than I. Why? Because I had him. Somehow, someway, I had him. The most beautiful man on the planet. I was enamored with him. I wouldn't say obsessed but then again, who really knew anymore. He was my everything. I was lucky to have him and I damn well knew it. Not a thing on the planet was going to keep me from him. Ever.

But I was a rational kind of guy. For the most part. I knew keeping him forever was a long shot. Putting aside the fate of the world and the gross creatures that tried to eat us every day, I wasn't exactly the best person on the planet. I had snappy habits and spoke before I ever thought. And yet, he stayed. At first, I thought it was out of need. We needed each other. Because it was impossible to survive this world alone. Two were better than one. But then it became more than just a need. It was a want. We _wanted_ to stay together.

So we did.

And I fell for him.

Then he fell for me.

Of course, I never expected it to be all happy smiles and good shit all the time. I wasn't oblivious but for once in my fucking life, I wanted something to go right. For Armin and I to work and survive.

Apparently... Even that was too much to ask.

* * *

"You taste like sunlight."

The bubble of giggles that brushed over my lips made me smile slightly as hands pushed against my shoulders. I pulled back just enough to meet big blue eyes full of love. He was beautiful. Breathtaking. His plump, kiss-red lips were pulled into a small smile, his button nose and round cheeks flushed red and his blonde hair was a fanned mess around his head and across his forehead.

"What does that even mean?" I shrugged at his question before ducking down to nuzzle into his neck, pushing his head to the side so I could plant soft kisses against his pale skin. "Jean." He spoke in a light tone, amusement clear in his voice. "You can't just say something super romantic like that and just leave me hanging."

I hummed against his throat, shifting to lay a series of kisses along pale skin. "I wasn't trying to be romantic."

"That's what makes it romantic, you big lug." Warm fingers pushed against my shoulders half-heartedly but my lips were currently preoccupied with marking his neck as mine. "Jean." He whined softly, lifting up a leg to bed at my side, his thigh brushing over my hip.

"What." I nipped at his skin, rolling it between my teeth for a second, earning the most delicious gasp from my lover. "I'm trying to make love to you here and you're being unusually difficult about it." I pulled back just enough to meet those sparkling eyes that stole my heart.

Armin's cheeks flushed a darker shade of red, his lips curled over pearly white perfectly straight teeth. "There are about three books underneath me."

"Oops." I chuckled softly, shifting to sit up so he could move.

Armin just laughed softly, sitting up, pressing his ass against my bent knees as he reached behind him to grab the books I had accidentally pressed him down on. "Like I could ever deny you." He pointed out, stacking the books on the pile beside our make-shift bed.

An arm slipped around his waist, pulling him a bit closer just as his arms moved around my neck, our lips meeting perfectly. He owned me. He would always owned me. He was too fucking perfect. I was beyond loving him. Whatever we had, it was special. There was no denying that and I knew he felt the same way. That was what drove me. Knowing he felt just as strongly about me as I felt about him. What more could a man want in his life?

* * *

The attic stairs made a soft clunk as I pulled them into place, closing us off from the rest of the world. I shrugged off the bag from my shoulders to drop it to the floor as I moved to my knees. I dug through it quickly only glancing up once to check on the slumbering form a few feet away. My fingers grasped the boxes I needed and I was on my feet instantly, snatching up a bottle of water from a pile before dropping down beside the make-shift bed.

I pried open the cardboard boxes, digging through the packets of pills before I found what he needed. I lifted up slightly and tugged down the blankets from his head, chewing on my lower lip at the sickly flush across his cheeks and nose. Damnit this wasn't good. He had to get better. He just had to. I swallowed past the lump in my throat and leaned close to his face, planting a soft kiss to his fever-flushed cheek.

"Armin." I mumbled, shaking him slightly. "Armin, I'm back."

"Ugh." He groaned softly, his eyes tightening before he blinked them open. Gorgeous blue glanced around dazed for a moment before they finally landed on me. "Jean?"

"Yeah, Baby, I'm here." I crawled onto the bed, slipping an arm under his back to lift him up. He felt like a rag doll, limp, as I lifted him and let him rest back against my bent knee. "You need to take these." I dropped a few boxes of pills on the blankets and tugged over the bottle of water to unscrew the top. Armin's head just lulled to the side and plunked against my collarbone, making me wince slightly. "Come on, baby. You have to do this." I grabbed a few pills and pressed them against his chapped lips. He groaned faintly but parted his lips so I could slip them in. "Good, that's good. Here." I pressed the bottle to his lips and tilted his back. "Swallow." I instructed, narrowing my eyes as some of the water dripped down the edges of his lips. But he swallowed as I told him to do. "Good, baby." I shifted him to rest against my chest as recapped the bottle of water and pushed it to the side. "Just one more." I grabbed the purple bottle and opened it, carefully leveling out the right amount in the small plastic cup as he rested against my chest. Using one hand, I recapped the bottle before bringing the plastic cup to Armin's lips. "Come on, open up." He groaned, his eyes still closed, but he parted his lips and let me push the cup so the medicine could slip into his mouth.

"Egh." He groaned, licking his lips after he swallowed the not so great tasting stuff. "That was horrible." He croaked softly, shifting to nuzzle into my collar.

"I know, baby. I'm sorry." I tossed to cup away to rub my hands over his overheated back. "But you needed it. You'll be okay."

"Mmm... Jean. Thank you."

I nodded and shifted to lay him back down. I pulled the blankets up over him and smiled as he tucked his head against my thigh, pulling the covers under his chin. His forehead was warm as I dropped my hand to card through sweat soaked blonde hair. "You just rest now." I mumbled, my shoulders relaxing at the way his breathing evened. "You're safe. You'll be okay. I love you, Armin. I love you so much." But he was too long gone to even register my words. That was okay though. I knew he felt the same way.

* * *

It was just sitting there. Beautiful, sparkling and just begging for me to take it. It held no value. Not really. But there was something behind it. Something that could mean the world to the little blonde I called my own. I bit my lower lip and glanced around the hospital, finding myself alone. We didn't have a lot of time but there was enough for this. With a deep breath, I dropped to my knees and quickly took out the small knife I kept in my boot.

The decaying finger was swollen, keeping the ring in place. So I had to cut it off. I narrowed my eyes slightly, positioning the knife before using my weight to cut into bone. I winced at the sound but took my prize from the finger that dropped to the floor. I twisted the ring around, giving it a good once over before wiping it clean on my pants. Armin would love it. Christmas was coming up. It was the perfect thing to give him. We couldn't get married but I knew a ring would be enough for him. I slipped the ring into my bag before getting to my feet.

The sharp screech made my blood run cold and I didn't even have time to stop the creature from lunging at me. Pain exploded in my vision, the bag falling from my hands as teeth sunk into my shoulder. I groaned, hitting the ground hard. Fumbling for a second, I kicked the creature off me and wasted no time in stomping its head into the ground.

"Fuck." I hissed, pulling at my shirt to take in the damage. "Fuck." The word was hollow as it hit me. "Shit shit no fucking hell no this isn't happening." I groaned, snatching up a roll of bandages. As quickly as I could, I undressed, bandaged the wound, and re-dressed, tugging on the jacket I hadn't been wearing to cover up any sign I'd been hurt. Not now. He couldn't know right now. We had to get out of here.

_I'm so sorry, Armin. I love you. So much. Always remember that. Never forget. You were meant for me. We were meant for each other. Forever and for always. I'm sorry I fucked it up..._

* * *

Those eyes were never meant to look like that. They were beautiful. As blue as the clear sky. And should have never been brought to such a stormy state. I never meant to make him cry. Those eyes were never meant to hold so much pain or cry so many tears. I never meant to hurt him... I never _wanted_ to hurt him. I love him too much to ever want to. But life liked to get in the way of anything I ever wanted and ruin it to the point of no return.

The last thing I ever wanted to remember about Armin certainly was not his eyes full of tears, his face contorted in pain and his body shaking from the pure anguish I caused him thanks to my carelessness. I'd never forgive myself. Not that it mattered. I'd be dead in the end. And he'd be safe... As long as he was safe... I could die... as long as he was safe... because... I... love... him...

* * *

All I felt at first was pain. From the tip of my toes to my head. Everything _ached._ Like my body was hit by a truck and was still trying to recover. I groaned softly, squeezing my eyes tight as I fought against the pain and tried to remember why it was even there. I couldn't remember. I couldn't remember a damn thing. So I focused on my body. Fingers, yeah they can move. Feet, legs, arms, neck. Everything could move. It just hurt.

"Fuck." I groaned out, finally opening my eyes into the darkness. I pressed a palm to my head, wincing at the slightly pain that finally started to fade away. I could smell blood but I wasn't sure where it was from. I felt around, finding I was laying on a soft pile of blankets. Carefully, slowly, I pushed myself into a sitting position. What the fuck was going on? What the hell happened to me?

Wherever I was it was too dark to see. I felt around for a while, my hands knocking into empty bottles and more blankets. Was I in someone's home? The floor was hard; like concrete. A garage maybe? What the ever-loving fuck?! The pain in my head subsided so I moved to my feet and started moving along the walls of the room, trying to find a door. The room was small. No bigger than a normal bedroom. And then I found stairs. I stumbled up then in the darkness before my head hit something. I groaned, clutching around until I found a handle. A twist and a push later and the door swung open.

"Fuck." My eyes immediately shut at the bright sunlight and an arm went over my eyes. The air was cool but it was fresh and smelt better than the place I woke up in. I waited a few minutes for my eyes to adjust before I opened them again, glancing around at the few houses around. My breath caught in my throat at the strange thing lumbering across the street. Its decaying head just stared at me, tilted to the side and then it was moving on as if I didn't interest it.

"No..." I quickly glanced down at myself, searching my hands, arms and every other part of me for any sign of harm or decay. No. I was fine. I was alive. How...

"Armin!" I suddenly gasped, memories flooding back into my head so quickly it left me spinning. I scrambled back down the stairs to glance around the room now lit with sunlight. "Armin!" But was he nowhere to be found. He was gone. Everything he owned was gone. "No... No... No!" I gasped and quickly moved back up the stairs, clutching at the stone before standing in the open air once again. "Armin!"

"This... Isn't possible." I clutched either side of my head and dropped to my knees, tears slipping from my eyes as my chest contorted in the most painful way. He shot me. I could remember clearly now. I'd been bitten and I felt it change me. I _felt_ the change. And then I woke up, feeling much like I did a few moments ago. I called out to him, confused... Upset and then... the sound of a gunshot. I should... be dead. I grasped at my hair, tugging and pulling for any sign that he had shot me. But I found none, other than the thumping of my head.

I was alive. I was alive and Armin... Armin was gone. Gone because he thought I was dead. He thought... He thought he killed me. No. No. No! I was on my feet instantly and dove back into the shelter, gathering everything I could. Maybe it was too late. Maybe it wasn't. But I was going to find him. He couldn't have gotten too far, could he? How many days had I been out? I couldn't tell... But I wasn't going to just lose him like that. Not when I... Not when I was _alive_. I could only pray that he was alive as well.

* * *

"Give me one good fucking reason why I should help you?" I snarled, narrowing my eyes at the tall brunette before me, her arms crossed over her chest and her eyes just as narrow as mine.

"Because _maybe_ I can fucking help you in return." She hissed, tapping her foot in annoyance. "We're alike, you got it? Mutated by this stupid fucking virus. All of us." She flicked a hand in the air, over the others off in the distance. "These things have no interest in us. We can use it to our advantage."

"I don't understand why I should fucking bother. I have important things to take care of." I turned away from her, ready to just leave the woman and the group I'd been with for a few days far behind me.

"Because maybe he's there."

I tensed at her words, my eyes widening slightly as I glanced back at her over my shoulder. "What."

Ymir sighed softly, rolling her dark eyes at me. "Look, I know what you're trying to do. Fuck, I sympathize with you. Got my own little blonde I'm looking for who happens to be trapped inside those walls."

I glanced to the looming walls in the distance that I had originally been heading for. "Your point?"

"Your blonde's a smart fuck right? If he saw those wall, he'd go to them?"

"Yeah."

"So maybe he's there."

"And that's why I'm leaving. To go find out."

"Place ain't safe. Specially not for us." She motioned between us and I knew she was referring to the strange... creatures we had become.

I narrowed my eyes slightly at her. "And how do you know that?"

She sighed softly. "Come on, Jean. Just hear me out. And then, if you still wanna go, go. I won't stop you."

I searched her dark eyes for a moment, trying to figure out what she was trying to do. But she didn't mean any harm and _had_ been relatively nice since we met. I could at least give her the chance to explain. "Fine."

* * *

It was supposed to be easy. Seeing him again should have left me with the most amazing feeling in the world. But it only left me filled with pain. There he was, standing on the shoulder of some mutant I'd never seen before in my life. He wore a military uniform, the straps standing out against everything and his crossbow was in his hands. His hair was a good deal longer, pulled back into a half ponytail. He'd lost weight. He'd never been heavy to begin with but his cheeks were sharper, his waist thinner. And his eyes... They were... different.

He failed to notice me, hidden in the back with the large horde of undead. He was focused on the blonde that Ymir finally had in her arms once again. Before I could move, before I could call out to him, the zombies moved. Armin was snatched up by the dark-haired mutant and they took off back toward the walls. I saw him, he never saw me. He was... different. Tougher. Angrier. He looked like he'd been through hell and I was certain he'd done just that.

"Fuck." I cursed, pushing past the horde as I took off running. Ymir called after me, something along the lines of "go get em tiger" before I heard the familiar sounds of the others shifting into larger forms. I didn't even bother to shift. I could move fast enough to avoid any attack coming my way. He was here. He was alive. He was all that mattered.

I skidded around a tank, coming from the side of the formation to see my beautiful blonde once again. But he was not alone. There was a larger blonde. Intimidating. My breath caught in my throat and I barely managed to shout his name. I'd gained attention with my shout and winced as a few bullets pierced my skin. But they didn't matter. I called his name again and took off running just in time to see him turn toward me.

And my world fell back into place all at once. Those eyes, full of hope and love, met mine and yes, _fucking yes_ , it was him. My Armin. Alive and well. But then that world quickly crumbled apart. The larger male pressed a gun to Armin's head for reasons I didn't understand and I barely had time to call out his name again before the sound of the gun shot rang out over the air.

The snarl that ripped from my lips was far from human when that body slumped to the ground and all I saw was red as the mutant within ripped my body to pieces to lunge at the bastard who killed the man I loved.

* * *

"Has he awoken yet?" I glanced down at the slightly shaking blonde female waiting outside the door of my room. Her hands were folded behind her back, her pale blue eyes wide with worry.

"No." I answered softly. "Not yet."

"Oh..." Krista chewed on her bottom lip as she glanced away to the floor. "I am sorry, Jean. I never... We never meant for him to get hurt."

"It's not like you could have known the military was going to fight this dirty."

"Still... Armin is my friend. He was... He was very kind to me in the walls. He... understood me." She sighed softly, those eyes meeting mine once again. "He's going to be so happy when he wakes up. He never forgot you, Jean. Never."

I wasn't sure if her words were meant to comfort me or not. So I just nodded. "Thanks. I'm going to..." I motioned to the door.

"Oh, right." She smiled softly and pushed away from the door. "Let me know when he's up."

"Of course." I watched her hurry off back to Ymir before pushing open the door of my room. It shut softly behind me before I turned to the bed where Armin was resting. My eyes went wide, the bottle of water slipping from my fingers to the floor as I moved forward instantly. "Armin!"

He groaned, sitting on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands. His body was bare aside from the boxers he wore and the necklace around his neck. It was easier to keep him clean that way. It had been a week since the fall of Trost. A week since I realized Armin was just like I. A week since I'd seen those blue eyes. "J-Jean?" He croaked out softly.

"Yes!" I sat beside him, wrapping up in my arms to tuck his head under my chin. "Yes, It's me. Oh thank fucking christ you're awake."

"W-What happened? Where am I? What... What's going on?"

Right. He didn't remember. It was a side effect of being shot in the head and forced into becoming a mutant. I pet his hair softly, nuzzling close. "Shh, it's okay. You're safe now."

He groaned, pressing against me, his fingers clutching at the front of my shirt. "It hurts. Everything... hurts."

"I know... I know... You'll be okay, baby. I promise."

* * *

"Does he really not remember anything?" The blue eyed, black haired, bucktoothed male sitting across from me spoke.

I perked a brow at him, glancing between him and Krista who sat on one side of him. He was part of the group of three that already inhabited this place before we came. "Yeah."

"But he remembers you?" He seemed truly in awe by this fact.

"It should be temporary." I said with a soft shrug, finishing up my soup as quickly as I could so I could return to Armin who was resting in our room.

"How long has it been? Since he woke up?"

Krista hummed softly. "Two weeks? About that I think."

I nodded in agreement, glancing between the two. "You never told me your story, kid."

The male blinked before a smile came to his face. "It's John, Jean." He rolled his eyes like he'd told me that fact a bunch of times. He probably had. I wasn't sure. All I could focus on lately was Armin. "My sister and our friend came here because another friend of ours told us to. It was nice to find a safe place. We're still waiting for our other friend, Dave. He's the one who told us to come here. Some place safe. Safer than those looming walls." He shrugged. "I don't know how he knew what Trost would become but he did. I'm glad we came here."

I nodded but when I opened my mouth to speak, his eyes widened at something behind me and his jaw dropped open. I perked a brow and quickly turned to glance over my shoulder. Armin stood there, panting softly, his eyes wide and his hair a mess. Also still in just his underwear.

"Armin!" I was on my feet instantly, Krista not far behind as I came up to him, grasping his shoulders tightly. "What's wrong? Are you alright?"

"Jean!" He gasped, blunt nails grasping at my arms as he stared up at me with wide, tear filled blue eyes. A sharp pin of fear prickled along my spine until I came to realize those eyes were different. Those were the eyes of a man who'd been through hell. He... He was back. "Oh my god." He gasped, his hands reaching up to grasp my face. "It's really you."

"Do you... remember now?" I gasped out softly, ignoring the soft whispering of Krista and John behind me.

Armin nodded suddenly, his cheeks flush and his eyes a mixture of pain and relief. "Oh god. I was right. I was fucking right. You're... You're a titan." He slumped and I moved just in time to catch him, clutching him against my chest.

"Armin. Armin, you have to calm down. You're still weak. You-"

"No." He snapped, his arms suddenly snaking around my neck to pull our lips together in a heated kiss. "I can't believe I couldn't remember and you just let me think everything was fine!"

"I didn't want to rush you." The corners of my lips quirked into a soft smile. "I knew you'd remember eventually. And you have and you... Hi Armin."

Blue eyes blinked at me, tears swelling in them as a smile came to his face. He took a deep breath and leaned against me, fighting the tears that fell down his cheeks. "Hi Jean."

* * *

The blonde stood at the edge of the building, his hands gripping the railing and he shivered just slightly as a cool wind blew, ruffling the blonde hair pulled back from his face. I bit my lower lip before stepping up behind him, arms circling his waist and chin resting on his shoulder. He hummed softly, his cold hands going over mine as he leaned back into my hold.

"This is real. It's not a dream." He mumbled softly, his blue eyes focused on the looming walls a good deal way. "I'm alive... You're alive..."

I nodded, pressing my face into his neck to plant a soft kiss there. "We're alive."

I felt his body shake as his throat held back a sob. Those eyes cried far too much for my liking lately. "I... Eren..."

"I know." I closed my eyes, tightening my arms around his waist. "We'll go back, Armin. We will. Soon. When we're ready."

"What if... What if he's hurt? What if they... Fuck." He cursed, quickly spinning around in my arms to burying his head in my chest. "I'm happy to have you back, Jean. I am... I can't even..." His shoulder shook with the tears that fell against my shirt.

"Shhh, I know." I smiled softly, rubbing his back as I planted a soft kiss to his hair. "It's gonna be okay. Somehow, it will be. Somehow we're together again. So we can do this. We'll get Eren back, okay? Together. For now... Prospit will keep us safe." The blonde in my arms only nodded, pressing harder against me.

I had him back. I fought hard to get him back and there was no way in hell I was letting him again. He'd been through hell without me, and sure I felt like shit for it, but I wasn't going to let him go ever again. Not when we were both Titans. We'd find Eren because it was important to Armin. Somehow, someway, everything was going to be alright. As long as we were together.

**Author's Note:**

> Jeeze, that hurt to write. But there we are. If you're a Homestuck you know who John is. Which means you know where this story is going. Crossover much? Actually it's a TINY crossover. The Homestuck story and the SNK story will stay mostly separate but just take place in the same AU.
> 
> Well thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed it! Don't forget to let me know what you thought! Kudos and comments are always welcomed!
> 
> ~Addy~


End file.
